Candlelight Writings

By TAH

Once upon a time, you were my everything
You were my passion
My hopes
My dreams
I can’t transform thoughts into words 
So I’ll show you a world beyond the depths of the sea 

Under the starry night sky
Under the wavering moonlight of the sea
Even though you will set sail tomorrow
And invisible knives  pierce my dainty feet
Hope filled my soul with colors  of the wind
Because today
It’s just you and me
In the copper gandala
With glowing lotuses 
Illuminating lanterns
And shimmering fireflies

I will forever remember this moment of ours
When I wanted to share my feeling of butterflies with you
Because I can’t describe this feeling
Was I truly in love?
Or am I infatuated over the charisma of your personality?
Maybe I will know the truth in the future
Or maybe I’m denying
That I love you?...

I love the way
You look at me adoringly when I brush my hair with a fork
I loved the way
You gave me a tired smile when I saved you 
I love the way
You held my hand when I could only smile 
I love the way
You still cherished me though my voice was silent
But…
Would you still love me
If someone else sang for me? 

Oftentimes I wondered 
What if I hadn’t given up that part of myself?
Would you still have fallen for me?
Would I still have had to fight for your love? 

But then I remembered the way your eyes glowed
When I stepped out of the waves
And onto that golden sand
When I bit my lip in concentration
Trying my best to make my way to you
On shaky legs

You picked me up
And nothing had been the same
You played my heartstrings
Until all I could hear
Was the song of the land I’d left
And the singing of the world I longed for 
I didn’t realize it then
But I see now
That I shouldn’t have traded
What defined me 
To my competition
Like some worthless oyster
And I realized that if she
Who had the pearl 
Was able to play your heartstrings
I’m not what you’re looking for

I just don’t see how a world
That makes such wonderful things
Could be this bad
I didn’t have the ocean waves to wash away the pain 
But I had you to help me forget them all 
Though I might not be that perfect pearl in the vast ocean
My heart crashes louder than waves on the shore
Your feelings might’ve been artificial
But you defeated my demons
And called to me from that ship 
Until I was what you wanted

There’s no one else but you
I gave up my fins for you
To be a part of your world
The mermaid’s destiny was to always plead for your love
Don’t make her bleed
Embrace me the way the sunset kisses the horizon
Protect me the way the clams claim their pearls 
Surrounded by seafoam, she decided to pray
That we can conceive a “happily ever after” as we sail away